When I was a little girl my favorite movie was Annie. I could watch it over and over again singing and feeling so full of glee. "These girls who don't have anything seem so free and happy. Look at them singing and dancing. I want to be just like them someday" I thought to myself. This is true when I was young I fantasized about what it would like to be very poor and free from all of life's weighty issues. Then...I grew up!

The grass is always greener isn't it?!?! I always wanted to be poor and guess what? I got my wish! Jamie and I are certainly on a tight budget, living hand to mouth really, and then a sad tragedy happened. My black peter died. Yes, my black speed wagon of the night that I have had since 2001, has officially passed away. On my way to work this morning, it stopped responding to me beating it like a horse to quickly dash me away to work, usually just in the nick of time to be considered not late. The transmission they say will be a minimum of $1700 for them to fix and I'm afraid it is time for Jamie and I to find a good burial ground for it...possibly where we can sell its organs for as much money as we can get.

Ah, yes my car died and a sad day it is indeed....BUT I will say that though it is quite distressing for me, at least Jamie is here to lift my head up. Though we are poor and walk through the grocery stores calculating (literally with our phones) and scheming to get the lowest priced meals possible, life with him feels rich. I'm not going to lie. I complain about being poor a lot...often whining "baby i'm just no good at being poor." Really, I'm not terrible at it, sometimes even better than Jamie, who up until recently has believed that getting into debt isn't terrible. He is slowly changing his tune, but it is a struggle for me to. I have such high expectations for everything and when they don't measure up all seems lost, which usually causes me to react unreasonably. However, I have a strong upbringing that you don't live past your means. If you only have $10 a month to spend on extras, you only spend $10. If you have none you spend none. My parents are really smart about money and I think I've learned a lot of tips and tricks from them that Jamie and I both want to mimic.

Thankfully, Jamie has a car and we will just have to share his for now. It does mean loss of independence in some sense. Riding together to work and coordinating schedules will be far from what we are use to and likely difficult, but somehow we will make it work. Somehow...even though my car had 165,000 miles and his has 185,000. Yes! Seriously! Ohhh dear....

Well, I will say this...Jamie is the only man I think I could go through this journey with. Yes, we fight (who doesn't?) and we don't have sex as often (who does?) as I'd like, but we love each other. Tonight in the grocery store Jamie and I both stopped next to the tomatoes, hugged and told each other we loved each other. For those of you who live in the real world, you know that that is real romance! Even after Jamie and I both gave, excuse me sold, our plasma to make money we both agreed that we loved each other and that there is no other person we could go through this crazy life with. Not having money certainly does cause some road blocks, but then again if you have someone to love you in the produce aisle maybe that helps make this crazy life worth something.