Ahh yes All nighters are ever so slowely draining my soul! Hmmm i miss sleeping so much! But even more i feel so thrown off my balance. At the moment i'm doing ok, with my awake level, but god knows that i'll have to take a huge nap before fred comes over tonight! Ok guys Jump is playing in Charleston Sat. U know u wanna go Rachel. I really wish Ellen could come, but we understand you wanting to go to France again! Guys the Working Title CD is like wow, amazing! Who knew? Geez esp. the last song, which i could tell immediately had to be co-produced by Jay. Well "I wanna write a song about our love... but there is non. Yeah Yeah Yeah." Oh yeah this is my last random comment. Everyone please pray that i pass Psychology with a D atleast. I'm so worried about that grade! Yeah i know non of these thoughts run smoothly together but oh well. Let's just say i was extatic last night when i got done at 4 cause that meant i got to sleep for 3 hours. Yeah when u get excited about 3 hours of sleep, u know that the Art Dept is slowly sucking the life out of you! Well good day to you all.

So yes everyone it is Sun. night, and here i am blogging away again! This weekend i had a lot on my to do list and almost non of it got done! Sadly enough! I just got back from the CAD lab and uhhhh i went to get work done, but immediately became stuck and could not get anything done! But ne ways yesth my daddy came this sat. to visit me! Even though we fought a lot before i moved out, things are better now that we have our space ya know! He really is a good man! I hope i find a husband as good hearted as my daddy! So not much else to comment on but goodnight to all!

-WARNING NOT WRITTEN IN BITTER TONE BUT LIGHT HEARTED ONE-
So yes i have been finding out reason's lately from guys on basically why they don't think i'm a good fit for them. You know what i've found out basically one person thinks that i'm a bad kisser, i'm too silly, and by that i'm taking it as too immature, and my recent list has been added on to by my request of my dear friend camel. So yes I can be embarrasing, too much energy for a guy to take as a girlfriend, meaning like it would be hard to have chill time. The energy thing i think is a good point that he made, but my response was something to the effect of "Even though i see how i am always looking for a good time, I am also a hopeless romantic, and love still moments." I thought i put the whole "still moments" thing quite well. Even though when i am hanging out with my friends most of the time, it's hard to see that relaxed side of me.
Most of my friends have never seen what i call my "up north way", by that i mean when i am up north with family i remain very composed. I'm not saying that i don't have a good time, but I have a more sophisticated, highly classy, laid back aire about myself. Which like i said is a part of me that lurkes mainly within the confines of my mile a minute jokester personality.
So ne ways yes tonight constance and i had a really good logical discussion. I think that we balance each other out very nicely as roomates partly because when i have an opinion about something she will keep me openminded to the other side of things, which i think keeps me grounded. U rock me constance. Real women of the good roomates association in lee wicker! We salute you good roomate of the year!
You strive to keep your roomate fully dressed in public, and always close the door when you pee. Always when you peeeee! You also make good cookies and take wonderful messages. WOnderful Messages! Tonight budweiser would like to thank you real women of the good roomates association in lee wicker because with out you there would be a girl wondering down to the basement to get toilet paper dressed only in a toga!!!

Hey yo yo yo! What it is monkey mama's. Yeah i'm so cleaver huh? JK. So yeah mmm my grandma's was fun. She bought me a really pretty coat, paid for me to get my nails done, took me out to some really really nice restaurants, mmmm and we went to the design center in D.C., and the designer's showhouse in the design center. She and I are such free souls! We don't let men weigh us down! Like when her husband (yes, my grandfather) kept ignoring her, and never paid her ne love, and he was dickin around on her, she left him, even though they had 6 children together. Of course she still loves him! He's married to some younger, not young, but younger, woman (Barbara) who takes care of him and calls him "Frankie Baby." Barbara is such a character, but we all think it's a travesty that all his money is gonna go to her when he passes. The only thing his sons (one of them being my father) is going to inherhit is the old building that holds his buisness in downtown Alexandria, which is valued at about 3 mill. I don't know exactly how much money he has but from all the conversations i hear from the family, 3 million. sounds like a huge jyp compared to what else he has. I dunno, of course it's his money he can do what he pleases with it.
Ne ways yes yes. Grandmother really really wants me to take over her buisness, "Jean Becker Interiors". Of course to have someone with that much experience help you take over their buisiness, sounds like a filet mignon is being given to you on a silver platter. I just don't know if i want to because the following
-that would restrict me to working in D.C. and to living there for probably more than half my life. I mean that ties me down to one specific place, that i'm just not sure i want to be.
- I have no clue on how to run a buisness
- I have no feild experience (when i graduate)
-I don't have ne money, which she would probably help me with at first, but what if it flops??
-what if i don't want to live in d.c.? I know i already covered that but .....hm
Maybe i'm just worried about being tied down to one place and one specific future!
Ne ways so yes for those of you who didn't know this i was originally born in D.C. Almost all of my family lives there, all excluding my immediate family, because god only knows they have a terrible case of gypsy blood.
So yes, it was nice to actually get back to school today isn't that strange! Yeah i know. But ne ways. Oh guys i've really gotten into the series, Nip/Tuck. It was crazy Fred was over last night and we were watching the season's finally together, and u know the ganster smuggling in heroin through breast implants in poor girls, yeah ne ways that's fred's cousin. I know it was crazy! He was like holy shit that's my cousin. He had told me about his cousin in the acting business before, but yeah that was a random moment.
You know what doctor Macnimara's trouble with his wife, is so sad! My biggest nightmare is marrying someone who pays me no attention, and never gives me sex. If i've saved my virginity for one man my whole life, my soul mate, then how terrible would that be to marry someone and never get any, after waiting all that time. I so want to just like, excuse my language, but just fuck all day, and make love all night. My other huge, huge, HUGE nightmare about marriage is that my husband will cheat on me. God thinking about it makes my heart break. Because after the've cheated on me I dunno if i could ever take him back even if i wanted to so bad, even if wanted to with all my heart i just couldn't let him get away with that.
So ne ways mmm yes my comments tonight have covered various topics. Well yes
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OH yes i got a shhh keep it secret....shh don't read aloud...(whispering)i got a speeding ticket. Yeah it sucks. Ne donations?? NIght night, i'm off to watch bob.

Heyyyyy i'm going to D.C. oh yeah, u know u jealous!! Hey everyone i have a new e-mail address, thanks to wonderful christopher, it is crazyjlcfan@animusart.com. It's mainly to keep my big files in cause hotmail fills up but if u sent me a nice e-mail telling me how much u love my blog that would rock! So yes this is to chris! Chris i just want to say thank u for being such a wonderful guy for rachel. You treat her really good, and u really make her happy! Ne ways enough with the sappy crap. You know what is funny my grandma has arranged for me to meet this far far far off distant cousin of mine, and go out to dinner on sat. night. Which does sound like lots of fun except for the fact that she is coming with us. Yeah i know she is a crazy bird. It's like a blind date but wierder cause my grandma is taging along. Who know's we just my grandma and i will probably go out on the town have a few drinks, u know be merry, dance ne where that will let us. So yeah by the way fred i know u never read my page, but the other night was really amazing. Good times, yeah and i got my laundry done for free! You know u jealous now beeahh! Alright well i'm gonna go get a techno CD from rachel to keep me company in the car, and then i'll hit the bank up and head out of town. Well i love u guys!

Tho yeth, ma ladies man accent is still wondering around in my head. But dat's ok. Tho yeth, ok emily stop yourself, stop talking like you like it in da butt! Ne ways yes so ok mmmmm god it is attacking me! The voice! Ahhhhh. (breath) Ok yeth, ahhhh ......yes so last week was really really really stressful, but this week has lightened up just a little bit. I'm excited about going up to D.C. for the break, I just hope that i have time to relax, without arriving with a list of people i have to visit. What else oh yeah i am really proud of my two projects that i turned in on monday.
U know what sucks my money supply is dwindiling at such a fast rate, and i really don't have too many winter clothes. So i called my mom and i've been begging her for money for a winter coat and she said we are poor too, "go to goodwill and buy a jacket for $3." Yup good ol paaaaaaa rentals what else are they good for besides money?? Naw jk! I love them and understand that they are broke too, but i keep having nightmares about freezing to death. Nightmares where i'm stuck here with no clothes and no money, living off of thompson food, and wearing my comforter to classes. Digging in the donation boxes around campus for extra layers of clothes.

Well well well, i'm gonna go cause constance is acting crazy!

Wow warning to all this post might be extrememly long, but it's only to make up for the lost times since my last entry. Whew, yes if i must say so this has been one hell of an over worked week. So yes on Monday of last week i posted that i was unmotivated, yeah well God did actually answer my prayer and blessed me with so much motivation it's sickening! This is my list of all nighters since! On tuesday i had classes till 3:30 then pulled an all nighter with ellen from 7pm-6am then i had an hour of sleep and went to classes for the day, then i go out and worked on homework etc.. till like 10 then went to sleepy, then thursday had class -3:30 and i went straight from my class to the studio to work then had a short dinner break and continued working with ellen again from 6 until 5am. Yes i know on a thursday night i did this. Ok then on friday you would think ahhhhh party time right, WRONG, i again worked on my projects from 2pm-3am. This was followed on saturday by me working in the studio from 3pm-11pm, then sun from 3-6pm! So if you can't tell i practically have lived there. I cannot wait to have a break! I wish i could just sleep for the whole 5 days, but i am gonna go visit my Grandma Jean in Washington D.C., which should be interesting cause god knows that woman and i together have spunk! We will probably go and check out capillaries, this is decidely me and my grandmother's nickname for hot guys! Yes also i forgot to include sat night's sleepover with rachel and ellen. Yes we did watch the ladies man. It was really funny. I think the funniest thing is that the urge to watch the movie was spawned by this really crazy girl in our Interior Design class who asked our teacher "Was your daddy a hamburgler Ms. Aaron? Cause it looks like somebody stole two fine ass hams and stuck them up your dress. " Yeah let's just say Chealsea gives us comedic relief in class when we need it most. So do you have ne extra curricular activites....."uhhhhh da butt." Yeah craziness!
Ummm hmmmm what else oh yeah holy monkey if there is a god boy oh boy oh boy do i need some! Real bad! Ok so that's about enough of that i suppose.
Oh yeah i know this is a great switch but uhh church with rachel today was long but interesting. We will probably go again! So ne ways much love to you all!

Ok so to finish off my last post, the show was great. Rachel and Ellen and i rocked out to some techno on the way down there. And Ellen recommended in the car that we call Camel to see if he could meet us at the show, which he did, so that was cool.
But moving on to the present. God someone, please come and take me away! Please I would pour my soul of tears out to your if i could be caught up with my schoolwork right now. I just keep putting off my readings, and keep putting off my readings, till i am to the place i am now. SO far behind i feel like there is no way i could ever catch up. Here i am blogging, but what i should be doing is reading for psych tomorrow, which only makes me more stressed out. I feel like the part of me that says "Emily you are a strong woman you can do ne thing you put your heart into", is fighting with the part of me screaming "Emily you are tired, take a nap! You can read this weekend!" My evil side has been winning out, and it sucks. I just feel like crawling in my bed and crying myself to sleep. Is there even enough hours in the day to do everything i am assigned to do. Oh and another thing Ms. Aaron, one of the 3 interior design teachers, is just gettng on my last nerve! Even though she says i understand you have other classes, she really doesn't act that way! She is being such a Bitch, not a beeah, yes indeed a bitch. I am so sick of her ego! Ok so she e-mails us atleast once a day saying something stupid like don't forget to bring your prisma's tomorrow, or like "I would like you to note that Architectural writing is a skill that takes a while to acquire" or mmmm "On tuesday there is a lecture about space in rutledge 222, it would be inspiring for you to go!" Ok so we (the class) take the e-mails read them and do what, but of course delete them. B/C most of them are simple notes that are not worth saving. Well today she proceeded to tell us that everyone should be printing out all of her e-mails and keeping them on file as a part of her syllabus! My response should have been "OK INTERIOR DESIGN GODDESS, SHAll I LAMANATE THEM AS WELL??" Geez get over yourself woman!!!!! Ah yes oh and basically she has assigned so much reading that we are suppose to be reading about 1 chapter every other night, along with working on our projects. NO matter what i do in that class my grade doesn't seem to go up either. Last year i loved her class and this year i want to take all my (or rather Rachel's ) technical pens and jam them up my nose and out my eye ball.
I had a biology test today, yes the class i never go to cause i can still make a B and not go, haha yeah well i could have made a good grade if i actually studied for the test today. Oh i tried but things like trading spaces got in the way last night.
I feel like the stress keeps mounting and the only way i won't die from it is if i run away from it! I don't mind working on my design projects, but reading! Geez reading! I hate it unless it's something i'm interested in! It's like i'd rather just write a blog than read something boring!
Well folks please i am begging you, please pray for god to spark my soul with passion about my school work. It would be ever so kind of you. I know that there are bigger problems in the world but right now my stinky arm pitts and my stress are just two of the major problems in my life!

So these past 24 hours have definitely been good times. Last night Constance and I met Brandon and Fred at the Comedy Zone, which was lots of what else, but good laughs. Then we decided to go grab some dessert, which only ended up being fair. During our meal of sweets Constance decided that she was gonna go back to Brandon's and stay the night, and then I decided to stay at Fred's house for the night. He taped Bob the Bachelor for me, yeah you know that was a nice touch, and then slept till like 6:30, in which i got up and drove back to the Thrill for my 8 am class. I have very strong beliefs about not letting boyfriends interupt your life too much, and never never interupt your goals. So even though i did go to my 8 am i came back and slept through my 10:30. After that my 12:30 CAD class teacher, greg, is an architect and instead of having class we all went to see his house that he designed and built. It's pretty darn cool, and then after the tour of his house and whatnot we went to the lake with the class to see a minataure vietnam war memorial. And tonight the fun will continue with a trip to Charleston to see Cowboy Mouth. Yeah that will rock so much, their concerts are like the best, even better than jump sometimes i think. I know that must say a lot huh? Well so what will happen tonight, I dunno i guess you will have to check my page again soon to find out! But until then....THE MADNESS CONTINUES!!!!!!!!! YEEEEEEEEEHAW!!!!

The other day i had this strange feeling that i wish i could cry, not that i never cry, it is just rare, which is a very very wonderful thing, except that crying does certainly have it's advantages. The sucky part is that you normally have something to cry about when you do cry, something that has upset you greatly usually, but it does have it's up sides. After a wonderful, all out ball session, your body feels exhausted with emotion but it almost feels at rest. Like a chamagne bottle that has just been opened after a long time of waiting on a shelf. The feeling of getting all the built and pent up emotions that ever so slightly annoy us from day to day are gone. I do not feel enticed to cry about anything very often, not that i am one to hold back feelings of any kind, but sometimes i wish there was something or maybe even a somebody to tug at my heart strings. "Terrible ideas... don't you just love those."
On another note "Under The Tuscan Sun" was a wonderful and extremely inspiring movie. Yes it is a chick flick, but for all you beautiful beeahhh's that read my page, you must, if you already have not, go to see it. It inspired my thoughts in many ways. One being that this summer I do not want to go back to New Orleans where i know no one except my immediate family, and Ms. Vicki (god bless that crazy lady). I also want to make lots of money this summer. I feel like maybe god might work it out for me to work maybe around the Washington D.C. area, since i have lots of family that i could stay with. I don't know i just know that this summer i want to go on an adventure! One were i can discover even more about myself, and just enjoy my independence. Not that independence has been a fresh idea in my book, because i've always felt like i ruled my own world in most aspects. Money seems to be interferring with these thoughts of not going back home, mainly because if i don't live with my family in new orleans, and if i don't find a place to stay for free or real cheap, then my dreams may be sadly stopped. I would like to stay in the Charlotte area as well, but then again you never know. I need to start praying about it so that god and i can atleast maybe discuss my options.
Well it is coming time for Rachel and I to go back to class, but until next time...
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!!!!